Giving a woman just one orgasm is cause for celebration. But any woman who can climax once can probably cross the finish line again—and again.
The ability to come more than once is biological gift exclusive to the fairer sex. A man has to wait for your refractory period to pass before they’re ready for round two, but women don’t seem to need the same reloading phase, says Men’s Health sex advisor Debby Herbenick, Ph.D. A woman could experience her second wave of pleasure less than a minute after the first.
But just because she can come twice doesn’t mean she will. Studies suggest that somewhere between 14 and 40 percent of women have had multiple orgasms in one session. How do you help her become one of the lucky ones?
First, make sure that’s what she wants. Some women would rather cuddle after climaxing than be pressured into an encore. Next, remember that women differ dramatically in regard to how they can achieve one orgasm, let alone multiple ones. So although there’s no single roadmap, try these tips to boost your chances of doubling (or tripling) her pleasure.
1. Create a lot sexual tension
Building up desire is a precursor to any sexual activity. But creating copious amounts of sexual tension can be just what she needs to achieve a bonus orgasm.
If you’re famished and someone is dangling a juicy cheeseburger in front of your face all day, not only are you going to eagerly scarf it down once you’re able to get your hands around it, you’re probably going to go back for seconds and thirds. The same applies to sex.
“You want her to retain her feelings of overall arousal when her body starts to relax after having the first orgasm,” says Amie Harwick, author of The New Sex Bible for Women.
So tease her early and often: Text her a sexy message in the morning, cop a feel under the table at dinner, and indulge in some PDA. By the time you get to bed, she should be extra “hungry” for sex. After she has her first orgasm, there’s a good chance she may be up for seconds.
2. Keep her idling
After she climaxes, give her clitoris a short break, as it becomes super sensitive for many women immediately after sex, says Ian Kerner, Ph.D., author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman.
But don’t stop the action completely: Spend a minute or two making out and attending to her breasts, butt, and any other favorite non-genital hotspots. Whisper in her ear about how beautiful she looks. Your goal is to keep her in a semi-aroused state so you don’t have to start from scratch to bring her back to the top of the mountain.
3. Rev things back up
After a woman has an orgasm, the blood that rushes to her genitals during sex lingers, making it easier for her to climax again, Kerner says. He advises men to prime their partner for round two with some dirty talk.
Then return your attention to her genitals. “Start with a light touch,” says Kerner. “Try lightly circling your finger or tongue over her clitoris slowly, and then work up to more extreme stimulation with an increasingly faster pace, more pressure, and intensity until she’s ready to go again.”
4. Try a new route
There’s nothing wrong with sticking with what works, but you can also try bringing her to orgasm by attending to a different erogenous zone. This can work particularly well if her clitoris is still sensitive from round one. Plus, novelty encourages the release of the feel-good chemical dopamine, which may help her orgasm faster, says Kerner. Aim for her G-spot with positions like woman on top or doggystyle.
Feeling more adventurous? Some women can climax from nipple stimulation, research finds. Lightly trace circles on her nipples with your fingers or tongue, building pressure as you go, or try sucking on them.
Want to crank it up another notch? Stimulate the area between her vagina and anus with your tongue, suggests Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of Idiot’s Guides: The Kama Sutra. Some women find it mind-blowing—but you want to check with her first.